In times like these, it is easy to lament at life for the hardship, setbacks, pain, and sufferings we are experiencing. Our anxiety is heightened, hope is almost lost, and despair is about to set in.

But even in such circumstances, we are alive and have many other things going well for us, yet those good things are not recognised, their value diminished, and much focus is on our inconveniences and lack.

Sometimes we need to appreciate what we have going well for us than our lack. To appreciate the true value of what we have, just imagine what the quality of your life would be if you had what you currently lack and lost all that you currently have and are probably assuming.

Many would rather wish they were dead than go through such life. James Ingram was right, “You never know what you got until it’s over” – Always You, 1993. By Nimroth Gwetsa, 31 July 2021.

Going through any loss is painful and no doubt, undesirable. Sometimes we should save ourselves and accept the permanency of situations such as loss of life, so we could move on and live a healthier life than life full of depression and sadness. But other times, we should never normalise acceptance of a diminished life if, given a chance and a hard push from ourselves, we can rebuild and regain, if not surpass, the levels we were at before suffering losses.

In all losses we can experience, death is the only one permanent, the rest are recoverable or can be mitigated with wisdom, zeal, and action. We just need the opportunity and ability to capitalise on it.

We should always keep alert and remove blinkers so we can see those opportunities because they will not come dressed colourfully and glamorously as we may expect them to. We could easily miss them if we are not careful. We would know we have missed them when someone else has seized the same opportunity we have let go of and they having made the most of and succeeded from.

By then, it will be too late for us to try getting it back. Like death, it may have passed and moved on from us forever. Let us not allow such to happen too often in our lives. Once beaten, twice shy.

Whatever we do in life, our focus should be in ourselves and not others. In others, we should draw inspiration, lessons, and a precedent, but never to be like them. We serve a unique purpose in this life and our competition, if at all, is against ourselves and not others.

I strongly believe there is a hole in our souls only the Creator of life can fill. Nothing in this world, however much we try, can fill that gap. Not even outperforming our fiercest competitor can bring satisfaction. If we look closely in our lives, and possibly our past, we will easily realise what I’m talking about.

Many try drowning the gap by filling it with sensuality, but that leads to unsustainable lifestyle that could lead to our demise and even early death. The best cure for such emptiness is serving our life’s purpose as intended by our Creator. Hence my earlier assertion that we play a unique role in life and contentment in it will come only if we serve that purpose and turn our focus on competing with ourselves than others.

By contentment, I do not mean acceptance of bad situations and having fatalistic beliefs that nothing about life will ever change. Contentment is accepting that you are not someone else, but only you should be the focus of progress and ongoing development.

Even in so doing, it does not mean bashing yourself every time you miss the target. But joyfully doing your best without destroying yourself and having sufficient motivation to want to try again. It starts with us identifying and recognising our purpose in life, realising we do not live only for ourselves, but to “serve” or add value to others. From this, we would realise that it is pointless accumulating things for ourselves if they do not enable us advance lives of others or add value to ensure advancement of life.

It follows that knowing our purpose is insufficient. Additionally, we need a clear vision of realising that purpose. Without a vision, we are as good as lost and dead.

Vision enables us to easily recognise and seize opportunities as they come by. It takes our eyes off others and messing their lives but occupies our mind and enables us focus on our constructive actions.

With a vision, we would not go through the motions of being alive, just drifting along day by day and hoping all will be well somehow on its own or miraculously. With a vision, we may have targeted to achieve certain things and in pursuit thereof, stumble across something else more beneficial as well. Then we could have double win of our original target and unintentional win just as Dr Alexander Fleming accidentally discovered penicillin in 1928 when mould grew on a Petri dish of Staphylococcus bacteria (Refer to the UK’s Science Museum for more details).

History has shown that unless we add to explicit body of knowledge, there would be no sustainable and advanced development. Our discoveries must be shared with and challenged by others if we are to advance. Keeping them to ourselves hinders theirs and our advancement.

With many facing near death experiences either from sickness or accidents, many having been in such situations would tell you that then, nothing else mattered to them, except their families and purpose their lives served them. By then, no material accumulated or experiences they had or enjoyed mattered in how they felt about themselves, but all focus was on the legacy they would leave and the purpose their lives served their survivors.

While enjoying what life brings before us, let us not deviate from serving our life’s purposes so we could avoid having lived a regrettable life. Let us be grateful for the opportunity to have experienced life, and let our lives count for something more value adding to the lives of others.

And those who suffered setbacks, be comforted in your loss and regain strength to rebuild from there. Cheers!